Monday, December 22, 2008

Oh the Blessings... oh the Memories!!

Are you ever tempted to take a picture at every even non-significant thing that happens in your life? Maybe you are not prone to do this... but I certainly am. Why is it that I want to hold onto every moment that occurs? I think "living in the past" is something I cherish more than living in the actual moment. I savor memories much more than the moment in which I currently live.

The brothers and I just ventured up to my Grandparent's house bearing the gifts of white-chocolate dipped ginger snaps as well as a jar of borrowed molasses. We joked around on our way up there, stomping through the snow and running in the street as crazy people would do.
After visiting with my grandpa and grandma for a few minutes, we returned, making snow angels along the way. It was perfect, yet now that it is past it is even more cherished than it was a mere fifteen minutes ago...

I need to find a verse to capture my thoughts in this moment and perhaps bring truth and clarity to the direction they should proceed from here. Let's see...

Philippians 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable,
whatever is right, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute,
if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise,
let your mind dwell on these things.

As long as I am praising God for the memories instead of simply trying to hold onto them, I am able to dwell on these things. Oh how my heart abounds with praise for the pure, lovely day I have had. Thank you Jesus!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Let it Snow!

Something about the snow brings joy and excitement to my heart!!
I know this is true for many people, and being who I am...well, I naturally ask why.
Is it the reality of the snow that brings this wonder? The look? The feel? The idea? The result?

For me it is the feel. It makes the inside of our home feel warmer and the colors of our scarves more vibrant in comparison to the purity it holds. The reality of the frozen drops of water is not anything exciting to me, for I prefer to observe our frosted farm from my bedroom window rather than engage in anything that could result in frozen fingers and freezing feet.

Let it snow!...not for the sake of snow itself, but for the gift of joy that it brings to our home. Yes, the snow is ideal for me. It supplies a lovely contrast of color and temperature and makes baking Christmas cookies in the kitchen that much more appropriate! Oh let it snow.

Saturday, December 20, 2008


Idealism can be a disease. I find myself sick with this disease at times, suffering with the symptoms of discontent and thoughts of what could be. It eats away at the joy I could so easily have if I would only turn my eyes to Jesus and look at the moments in my life as blessings that could only possibly come from Him.
Life is never going to be "good" unless it is accepted as it is. Often when watching movies, especially around Christmas time, I long for the "warmth" and "joy" and just "idealism" that they portray. I am filled with discontent and a longing for more... Oh how foolish I am! My eyes are blinded to the reality of my own blessed life by a glimpse into lives of people who were merely imagined. How pathetic is this? I do not know that I have a point, for my thoughts rarely reach conclusions, but I do know that this is a problem; and, like every other problem in my life, I can not solve it on my own.
God is able to solve it; therefore, I do not worry. I am not troubled. The Lord is my strength, and only He is able to rescue me from my discontent. He fully satisfies me. I need no idealism. He is my warmth and joy. What more could I need?

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Fun Fun Fun...

Recently, I have been thinking about fun. What really makes fun? and how? why? when and where? It is a mystery to me. Yes, I am being very reflective, but honestly, I want to know.
There is a difference between fun and joy.
Joy comes from the Holy Spirit. I have joy in my heart, I really do. Fun...however...I am not so sure. I can have fun when I am with other people who initiate it... but on my own, not so much. This is not a bad thing. It's the way God has made me. I need to accept it. Surrender it. Simply surrender.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

what is interesting?

Why is it that I can never find anything interesting to talk about? I do not think I have the genetic make-up of a very good blogger, I've decided. What I enjoy talking about is deep and complex... not necessarily humorous or entertaining. Is that what is important though? I hardly think so. My perspective so easily shifts back onto the things of this world and simply what my eyes can see. It is a constant battle to keep my eyes where they should be...on the eternal.

Monday, July 14, 2008

More from Tozer...The Pursuit of God...My favorites

"Has it ever occurred to you that one hundred pianos all tuned to the same fork are automatically tuned to each other? They are of one accord by being tuned, not to each other, but to another standard to which one must individually bow. So one hundred worshipers meeting together, each one looking away to Christ, are in heart nearer to each other than they could possibly be were they to become 'unity' conscious and turn their eyes away from God to strive for closer fellowship."

"'Be thou exalted' (Psalm 21:13) is the language of victorious spiritual experience. It is a little key to unlock the door to great treasures of grace... His Christian life ceases to be the complicated thing it had been before and becomes the very essence of simplicity."

"Not perfection, but holy intention made the difference."

"God wants the whole person and He will not rest till He gets us in entirety. No part of the man will do."

"Jesus calls us to His rest, and meekness is His method. The meek man cares not at all who is greater than he, for he has long ago decided that the esteem of the world is not worth the effort... Come on, humble yourself and cease to care what men think."

"Artificiality is one cures that will drop away the moment we kneel at Jesus' feet and surrender ourselves to His meekness. Then we will not care what people think of us so long as God is pleased. Then what we are will be everything; what we appear will take its place far down the scale of interest for us. Apart from sin we have nothing of which to be ashamed. Only an evil desire to shine makes us want to appear other than we are."

"Keep reminding God in our times of private prayer that we mean every act for His glory; then supplement those times by a thousand thought-prayers as we go about the job of living. Let us practice the fine art of making every work a priestly ministration. Let us believe that God is in all our simple deeds and learn to find Him there."

"It is not what a man does that determines whether his work is sacred or secular, it is why he does it. The motive is everything."

The Background

On Saturday my family was walking around downtown Portland after going to a movie at Pioneer Place for my brother's birthday... the movie got out around ten o'clock, and as we were walking back to our Suburban in the parking garage, we observed many different people. People who looked as if they had no hope. People who looked lost. People for whom I wrote those thoughts in my previous post.
We are called, by Jesus, to share the Good News with those we encounter, but as I was taking in every sad face and rebellious spirit that evening, I truly wondered HOW anyone was to go about doing that most effectively. I realize that quite often we lack courage to speak up because we fear rejection and rationalize that, "Actions speak louder than words," and those people on the streets have not seen our actions... but WHEN? HOW? WHO? Will anyone reach those people?
The thoughts of my quiet time earlier in the week also rushed into my head that evening... I have been reading in 2 Samuel. David wanted to do it all. In addition to all the battles He fought in the name of the Lord, he also wanted to build God's dwelling place, the temple. God said no. The lesson: we can not do it all for the Lord. All He asks is that we do what He has called us to do.
I can not say that I have been called to reach out to the homeless people of Portland, but my heart still aches for them. I can pray. I can ask for the Lord to put the calling into someone else's heart, can't I?
Oh Lord, I will have faith in your perfect plan.